The Sommerville Family
In the spring of 2000 the fourth of our six children graduated from High School and, a short time later, left home following her three older siblings continuing her education in a neighboring state. With only two children left at home, Melissa, age fifteen, and Allison, age seven, the house felt empty and quiet. Allison began to complain that she didn't have anyone to play with and I began to reminisce about the fun times our six children had playing games together and going on family outings. It seemed like there should be more children around again.
While reading the local paper one day I saw an article about adopting "special needs", i.e. older and disadvantaged children. It occurred to me that adopting an older child might be an opportunity to simultaneously provide a playmate for Allison and to help a child in need. I brought up the idea with my family and they reacted positively. After several months of deliberation we decided to learn more about the process and find out if there is a child who might fit into our family. We contacted the New Mexico Children, Youth and Families Department and soon thereafter were enrolled in an adoption-foster care training program. After completing the class, the required home study program and the background investigation we found ourselves qualified to adopt.
After completing the qualification process we assumed that we would receive a telephone call from the Children, Youth and Families Department informing us that they had evaluated our family profile and preferences and had found the ideal child for us to adopt. However, nearly a year passed without receiving such a call. Undeterred, we repeatedly perused the CYFD publications containing photos and biographies of children needing adoption but somehow the connection that would have brought us together with a child never occurred.
Eventually, we decided that we would need to be more pro-active. We picked up the telephone and called our assigned caseworker to inquire about the status of our application. Still, the anticipated meeting failed to materialize. We began to wonder if we had been lost or overlooked in the system or had been deemed to be inadequate parents. Finally, after several calls we were invited to attend a special event in Santa Fe, NM called "The Heart Gallery." This event would be held at a local art gallery where prospective adoptive parents could view professional portraits of children needing families. Moreover, many of the children who were the subjects of the portraits would be there and meetings could be arranged if desired. We enthusiastically agreed to attend the first ever (although unknown to us at the time) Heart Gallery event.
At the Heart Gallery we strolled through aisles of portraits of children. The subjects of these marvelous photographs were variously shown as being playful, pensive or introspective, caught by the camera's eye displaying a spectrum of emotion as diverse as the children themselves. We were impressed by the quality of the photographic work and the portraits of these wonderful children touched our hearts. There were several that we thought could be a match for our family but one photograph in particular stood out. It depicted three delightful young girls playing outdoors and dressed in fanciful princess costumes. After some discussion my wife and I decided we wanted to meet these three little princesses. We located our caseworker in the crowd and asked about the girls. We were delighted to be told that they were at the event and a few minutes later we were introduced to three lovely sisters, ages four, seven and eight. Although it was a brief introduction, one which none of our three adopted children recall, it was sufficient for us to decide that we wanted to consider adoption of these sisters. The next day we contacted our caseworker and requested adoptive placement. Two weeks later we met the children at the home of their foster family for a weekend visit. That was followed by a weekend visit to our home and shortly thereafter Vicky, Jannae and Vanessa joined our family. Following the mandatory six-month trial period the adoption was finalized.
Four years later these three children have become fully integrated into our extended family. They adore their five sisters and older brother and are thrilled to be part of a large family with numerous aunts, uncles and cousins.
Naturally, there were difficulties in the beginning and a period of adjustment that required accommodations by every member of the family. But the major challenges have been overcome with very few crises. Today, I believe we are a family that faces no more, and perhaps much less, than its share of the usual difficulties that all families are confronted with. Melissa, our oldest daughter at the time of the adoption, is the protective big sister, and Vicky, Jannae, Vanessa and Allison are happy go lucky playmates. It's been a wonderful experience.